I wanted to be able to write that I wasnt sick anymore, and then last night, in the middle of sleeping, I got smacked in the face by a whopper of a nausea spell. God that sucked. I had to take half a unisom.
I’m feeling this thing wiggle around like I did with the monkey. Medicine can say that I cant all it wants, but there’s something moving in there, damnit. And it tickles. Its cute. Just quick little flutters, like there’s a butterfly inside of me that’s beating its fragile wings against my pelvis. It mostly happens after I’ve eaten a shitton of sugar.
Wow. Almost 10 weeks.
Its kinda crazy how quickly this went. As much as I wanted to barrel past these last 6 weeks and get straight to the fun stuff, I didnt think it would actually happen. I guess that’s the way things roll when you have another kid to take care of. I cant sit here and be fearful every second of every day and agonize over whether or not I should eat that slice of pizza. I did eat it. Because I didnt have the time to grab something else. I have a career (ish), and an 8 month old, and time moves very quickly these days.
Jules is starting to wake up, now. I have a conference this week, so I’m able to lounge around in bed with her for a bit before heading out and taking her to day care. I’m thinking ahead to my maternity leave early next year, and wondering if she’s going to be around for all of it. On one hand, I hope so. She should see her little brother or sister growing up and experiencing all the things that she did. And on the other hand, I think I’d go nuts if I had to police a 15 month old AND take care of a newborn. Then I remember… dude, newborns just lay there. They eat, sleep, and poop.
Lots of time to think about that, later. I’m gonna go snuggle with the kid I have and the kid that’s inside me.
I am grateful I have been given another day to be a mother to this bean.